Matsu Hentai-Neko-Chan ([info]eightfold) wrote,
@ 2004-05-12 23:50:00
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L5R Haiku


Crab:
We are the best clan;
we cover all your asses.
Where are our blowjobs?

Crane:
We are not all gay.
No really, we're not. Damnit.
Yes, it's our real hair.

Dragon:
Killing the moon, and
Our families, teachers, selves.
Shaitung's man-bosoms.

Lion:
So honorable:
And yet, burning Matsu rage.
Nimuro plays Go.

Phoenix:
You do not fool me.
Gisei Toshi: SO tainted.
Fu Leng's bitches, all.

Scorpion:
Machiavellian -
There go my syllables. You
planned this, you bastards!

Unicorn:
We're dirty gaijin.
Even our Goddess was dissed
by Yoritomo.

Daigotsu:
Tainted, Pure, Hantei.
General, priest, bishounen.
Make up your damn mind.

Naseru:
Still not Emperor.
Oh wait, Tsudao just bit it.
Heh heh heh. Go, me!

Kaneka:
I AM the strongest!
Suddenly, fire chicken.
Fucking tournament.

Tsudao:
Flash of golden sun,
alas eaten by Tsuno.
Bye, Empress Smiley.

Aikune:
You fucking wanker!
Just wish for a new girlfriend.
Mom doesn't love you.

(20 comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]swordlily
2004-05-12 10:47 pm UTC (link)
XD XD XD XD XD
XD XD XD XD XD XD XD
XD XD XD XD XD

Allow me to indulge in belated icon-love. I adore O-Ushi. And her hammer.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-12 10:50 pm UTC (link)
Wow. That's a lot of smileys.

God, I love O-Ushi too. Aside from the fact that she's ME, boobies and smash-y things and all, damn good card.

Why did they make her marry a My Little Pony Gaijin Unicorn? Whhhhyyyy? O-Ushi/Uji FOREVER!

Look, look, gay!

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]swordlily
2004-05-12 11:20 pm UTC (link)
Because they were compelled to breed their major NPCs like prized show dogs?

Ironically, I found the story that covered her wedding one of the more entertaining official fics.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-12 11:22 pm UTC (link)
"Kuon-sama! Your pelt, so soft! So shiny! And your nose, so wet!"

Though I suppose he is Reiha's bitch...

... huh. I don't think I read that one. Have a link, or has it been LOST TO TIME?

I need more icon snark material. Maybe I should pick on Aikune some more. Or Kaneka.

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[info]swordlily
2004-05-12 11:35 pm UTC (link)
Fic is here:

http://l5r.alderac.com/miyaarchives/wife.html

One of the two things written by Ree Soesbee that I've actually enjoyed.

Actually, my first thought when I read 'suddenly firechicken' was KANEKA ICON!

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-12 11:38 pm UTC (link)
But does it have MAD UJI/O-USHI DOGGY-STYLE ACTION, DAMNIT?

... okay, I really am a thirteen year old fanboy, I admit it, but man, that's a hot image.

Actually, my first thought when I read 'suddenly firechicken' was KANEKA ICON!

... A WINNER IS YOU! Whee.

BTW, you want any? I'm sure I could dredge up something clever and Sparrow-ish.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]swordlily
2004-05-13 12:10 am UTC (link)
If you have icon mojo to spare, I'd be honored. I would adore something clever and Sparrow-ish. Sparrow are just so /cute/.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]swordlily
2004-05-13 12:21 am UTC (link)
O-Ushi=Super-seme

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-13 12:24 am UTC (link)
She needs to come back from the dead and make out with Doji Yasuyo.

I need a "Bend Over Kaneka" icon.

Damnit, anigifs are HARD.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]nazonatte69
2004-05-13 07:26 am UTC (link)
may i join the _s_rank lj community please?

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-13 07:27 am UTC (link)
Since you apparently can't read the userinfo for said comm and need to spam my journal, nope, you can't!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]kitsune_jade
2004-05-14 06:06 am UTC (link)
Just passing bye to say I adore your L5R icons especially the Nagori one. XD And your haikus are so hilarious. ^_^

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-14 12:37 pm UTC (link)
Thank you!

... any L5R icons you want? I'm apparently on an icon-making spree.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]kitsune_jade
2004-05-14 01:21 pm UTC (link)
Kakita Yoshi ones would do. I just adore that guy. XD

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-14 02:27 pm UTC (link)
Here and here. Feel free to gack!

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]kitsune_jade
2004-05-14 11:51 pm UTC (link)
Thank you.

Hehehe, fan of justice is so Yoshi. ^0^

(Reply to this) (Parent)
Just a wandering refugee
[info]usagi_k1
2004-05-25 08:13 pm UTC (link)
Totally off topic, but I just followed the trail of L5R icons over here from the /user/bin/w00t LJ. I've read the past few entries, and you've forced me to think about L5R fiction in ways I really didn't want to...

But it's a shitload better than hearing bitches cry about card rules on the CCG mailing list. Rock on, fangirl, even if I don't get the fandom fascination with yaoi. Although I'm surprised Iuchiban/Yajinden testosterone-fueled s&m yaoi hasn't reared it's leather clad head, with Mohai as The Gimp.

(Reply to this) (Thread)
Re: Just a wandering refugee
[info]eightfold
2004-05-25 08:20 pm UTC (link)
For what it's worth, I'm also obsessed with power-dynamic laden semi-incestuous het. And yuri. I'm an equal opportunity fangirl. If they're hot, and also related, I'm all for having them fuck. Sunetra x Hachi 4-EVAH! Shoju x Aramoro x Kachiko x Asami x Yojiro OT5! Etc etc. (And I'm actually horribly, horribly fond of Shaitung, for all I mock her (see icon) and think she needs to settle down and marry that nice Isawa boy.)

You've just helped me decide what my next icon is going to be. Thank god for Photoshop.

(But as for the yaoi obsession, for the most part it's because it's FUNNY. Because, Kaneka being gay? PURE COMEDY.)

(Reply to this) (Parent)
Hare Clan
[info]usagi_k1
2004-05-25 08:15 pm UTC (link)
Bloodspeakers hate us
If we are so damn cool, Rich
Why saved by the Crane?

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]eightfold
2004-05-25 08:24 pm UTC (link)
Still, it could be worse.
We could have been like the Ox.
Heeeere, Kolat Kolat!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

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